It’s your February Fifteenth Davey Mac Sports Report and with all this LeBron James hysteria going around, Mr. Michael Jordan has a nice bucket of cold water for “The King”. In an interview, Jordan said that he would take Kobe Bryant over LeBron because of Kobe’s five NBA titles to James’ one. Jordan also went on to say- “When I was LeBron’s age, I had three rings already and NO weird, fucking head-bands hiding my rapidly balding head. Hey, LeBron, we fucking know you’re losing your hair, enough with the head-bands already, you high-fore-headed freak!! I mean, Jesus, it’s like I’m looking at a black Conehead over here!!! Hey, everyone, look at the African-Alien light-bulb-face!!! Hahahaha!! Fuck off, Baldy!!!”
Speaking of Kobe, his Lakers got annihilated by L.A.’s best basketball team, the Clippers, last night- 125 to 101. In fact, to start off the game, Blake Griffin scored ten points before the Lakers even sank one measly basket. Chris Paul had 24 points and 13 assists. The Lakers SUCK. I don’t even like writing about them anymore…but I have to…because they still are a preeminent sports organization. But they really do suck the ass of a retarded donkey. Shit, I’d rather write about the time I took a ripe cantaloupe and slam-dunked it on the head of my fifth grade gym teacher, Mr. Clarkson. It would be a cute story…except for the fact that the incident happened two years ago when I was 33 and drunk at a Shop Rite and the guy turned out to be, in fact, NOT Mr. Clarkson, but a police officer. Oh well…
After saying that he’ll “always be a Red Sock” on Thursday, Kevin Youkilis now says he’s “proud to be a Yankee” (his current team). Youkilis then flipped a coin in order to decide whether he was gonna rob the bank at Gotham City or leave it alone.
The Davey Mac Player of the Day goes to Micahel Jordan, who turns 50 years old on Sunday. Congrats, Michael, I’d buy you a Blu Ray for a gift…but something tells me you probably own every Blu Ray of every movie ever made. In fact, now that I think about it, could you send me a present? Preferably, some money? I’ll take twenty thousand dollars in cash…thanks, MJ!!!
See you guys Saturday for the Davey Mac Sports Program XL on Sirius XM Satellite Radio!! 7 PM Eastern, 4 Pacific on Sirius 206, XM 105!! Arrivederci!!
-Dave (2/15/13)